Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
