It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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