i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
