Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Randomize
