I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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