i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
