Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Randomize
