I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize