My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
