My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
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