i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
