Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Banned from zoo.
Again?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
