when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize