Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Randomize
