If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
