Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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