My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
