Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
