talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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