dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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