dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
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