508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize