Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
I know her cup size but not her name....
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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