She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize
