So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I wish they made helmets for livers.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
