I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
You need Xanax blowdarts
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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