Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize
