but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Randomize