I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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