what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
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