You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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