someone get that fucking seahorse.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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