this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Life is so much better after having sex.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Randomize