Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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