remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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