just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
