he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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