I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
