WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize
