Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
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