im about as happy as oj after his trial
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
