Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Randomize
