omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
there was a trapeze. enough said
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
