And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
