Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
