there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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