Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
