come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
