i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Randomize
