This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize