Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
